I began teaching in 1975 and have had thousands of kids come through my taekwondo school.
During those early times the kids were more robust and were a lot stronger both physically and mentally. I’ve noticed a very definite shift over the years, toward over protection by parents, which is leading the kids into a fear of trying something with full-on intensity.
Now don’t get me wrong, parental protection for kids is a must, teaching them about being careful and the dangers to be careful of, is sensible; but trying to protect them from everything; from falling over, climbing trees, playing ordinary games and more importantly from feeling any mental pain such as failing at something is definitely not helping them to become confident and outgoing.
This over protection stops the child from learning from their mistakes and learning from our failures is the only way to success in any endeavour.
Kid’s need to fail!
For example, if a student fails a belt test, they know they didn’t do well enough to meet the pass criteria. They will be told why they failed, then what to work on to be able to pass next time.
But at the time, they will feel disappointed and hurt and maybe embarrassed, however, it’s important they realise that failing is a method to show what your weak points are and it’s only by trying hard that they can fix those weak points and be successful.
Feeling sorry for a child and passing them anyway is not only unethical it’s downright wrong. It sends a message that says “it’s ok not to try hard.”
There’s an awful lot of rubbish talked about what being successful is, and it’s not having money, fancy cars and a fantastic lifestyle.
My definition of success is very simple and it applies to everybody, young or old.
Success is simply achieving a goal you set for yourself. That’s it! and… it’s ok to fail before finally achieving it.
That’s why children need to fail; failure allows them to try again and again until they succeed.
It’s a necessary part of learning to become mentally and emotionally strong for life.
All successful people learned from their failures.
Learning to cope with failure can be a life changing experience. So let’s allow our kids to learn from theirs.